Monday's Makeover

Even though holidays are still a few days away, I have decided (temporarily or perhaps permanently) to discontinue blogging. Maybe after holidays I will again take it up, but at this time I do not feel it is of any help, both to me or to those reading. I think I just need to think about what the purpose of my blog is (be it spiritual or ranting on idiot (cows/pets) subjects, or just personal thoughts). Thanks for the comments over the past 3 months.

Sunday's Slow Stride

Sorry I am so late again. Wow two Sundays in the last couple of weeks. Had a great visit with friends again over the weekend at their cabin. Ended with a water fight with two of the Mom's against two of the kids, and I was in the middle, telling both sides who was hiding where. Had a great time. Hope everyone had a great weekend.

Saturday's Senselessness

Why is there so much hype when an author decides to kill off a character. I am referring to Harry Pothead. People are whining and complaining because she is going to kill off the star of her books. Who cares. This is a fictional character. People almost believe Harry Potter exists, and to them it is like killing a member of the family (must be a pretty shallow family some people have). Get a grip people.

Friday's Fatigue

Well I took a long hard look (well maybe not too long) at myself the last couple of days, and I honestly feel that apathy has set in. I know you are thinking, "What you just noticed that now?" There is no joy at work, no passion for anything, just laze around like a freaking bump on a log. Not only in life but obviously spiritually as well. I mean if I am a Christian there should be passion, zeal, joy excitement about the fact that God is in my life. I am not always a firm believer in being run by my emotions, although there are times, when they do run me. This may be happening now for a good reason, or it just may be a sign of being tired of same old same. Time for change, maybe. Change can be good. Hmmmm, well that is what they say. Guess we will see. Stay tuned.

Thursday's Trials

This has been a really dry month spiritually for me. Kind of my 40 days in the desert. Hmmmm In the desert because I guess at this time this is where I need to be, and maybe still in some ways want to be until i can figure things out. Even lately it has been easier to blog about "non-spiritual stuff". Whereas a month ago I enjoyed (to a point) all of the questions I was raising, even though I was not able to find answers to all of them. I am sure I will continue to blog on both topics...but when it gets to the point of blogging only on the non-spiritual end of things I will stop blogging all together. I even thought at one point I was very close to climbing down the wall to the narrow road, only to climb back up and start climbing down the other side. Ups, and downs, slips and slides. Almost feel like I am paying the real life version of snakes and ladders...interesting name in terms of heaven and hell when you think of snakes and ladders.

Wednesday's Whopper

Maybe you have heard over the last week about Shambo the bull with the disease bovine tuberculosis ( I did not think I could spell it either). The Hindu's are complaining (hmmm what was that I said yesterday about complaining) that this bull is a sacred bull to be revered. Have you ever "HERD " of something so ridiculous. This is "UTTER" foolishness. There are people who are out there in the world who are petitioning for the bull's life to be spared and have set up a web site called, yeah you guessed it "MOO-TUBE" . Here is a quote from the article that says,
"Brother Jamie, one of the monks who lives on the 115-acre monastery and tends to Shambo every day, told the BBC the monastery "had an awful lot of letters and phone calls of support from people we don't know — people who are not particularly religious but who appreciate we are making a stand for what we believe." This is ludicrous. People have nothing better to do than to stand up for something that don't mean a thing. A bunch of MOOrons, okay so I stretched that one a bit. Not sure if they have put Shambo down or not. Let's hope so, after all there is only so much BULLONEY one can stand for one day.

Tuesday's Temper Tantrum

As you read, note the big container of salt next to this....you may need to take this with a grain or two or more. I am sure we are all familiar with the saying, "If at first you don't succeed ...stir stir again" or something like that. ;) So tell me...How do you think ministry should be "performed" in the church? Should it be done individually, should some help out and not others...should we all be involved?? Is it just the pastors who should be involved in "programs"? (after all they are paid for that ....right???) I hope you know I am saying this tongue in cheek, Hmmmm. Hard to tell when I am typing. Everyone (Pastors) have different job descriptions with in the church. Some preach, some teach, some administrate, some lead worship, some lead children youth etc.... When some event is going on, say dessert theatre...should they (Pastors)all be involved? Hmmm, I don't see that in my job description, guess it is not my responsibility. The way I sometimes see it, is if people in the congregation see the pastors doing stuff (volunteer stuff) , they will be involved too.... hmmm or will they??? Those of us who work in a church can complain just as well as those who don't....be you pastor or janitor. Maybe attitude is the problem....not just mine either, trust me I know I have one, we all do to some degree. Don't we? Trust me, we do! I guess only you can answer for yourself. Life should not be just bitch and then die. It seems it is just our nature to complain. Maybe we watch too much news on TV and figure there is not a lot of good going on in this world so why should I let there be any sunshine in me at work or home for that matter. There is a lot of good going on in the world and in the church, having said that there is a lot of &$%^ going on in the church and in the world also. Attitude is a big part. Let's face it, God never promised us a rose garden, not here on earth...and if He did there are thorns in it so watch it. A few months ago when I first started blogging, I mentioned about not complaining or gossiping for a day. Obviously one day can make a little difference (in a lifetime), kind of like one grain of salt on my baked potato. It might add flavor to the smallest possible bite, but after that the added flavor is gone. I am not just talking to you who read this blog and fall into this category , I am writing this to remind me it is a daily thing that needs to come to mind or we will just continue where we left off the other day. Just like the drug addict who goes one day without ( how would I know, hmmm) in order to make a difference in himself, one day won't do anything without a 2nd, 3rd etc right up until the end. Feel free to call me on it when I complain without reason (Oh never mind, I forgot about tomorrows blog on the sacred cow issue). After all this digressing, my opinion on ministry is that when there is something going on and it is not in your realm of work of ministry...you make it your realm and support what the other pastor is doing. It's not about US after all, it is about what God wants of us. We work in the church, and if we can't support each other in what we do (whether we agree with or like the other person or not) then we are fairly useless to the people outside the church because we are no different...it is ME, ME, ME. There needs to be give and take, not take and take, (that's just obvious) and not give and give either (that's just burnout). Well I think I have stirred the pot enough, but I did bring a big container of salt with me....oops I think it's empty now. Hmmm good thing we are salt of the earth right????....course I think in the Bible (Matthew 5), it talks about salt being usless when it has lost its saltiness....well, not quite useless, it is good enough to be thrown out to be trampled on by others.

Monday's Mishap

Back to the topic of regrets. I keep bringing this up obviously because I have not dealt with those regrets of mine, at least the ones that keep coming back up, like sour milk...you know the feeling I mean??? Some regrets are so small I am able to (at least for now) brush them off. Those bigger ones keep coming up faster than the gophers at the church and are the harder ones to suppress. Almost to the point where I can't keep up...thank goodness for my music that I keep playing all day long...it helps at times to push that sour milk back down before I begin throwing up. As you know, it has to come out sometime ... somehow. I have not quite dealt with them yet...hypothetical situations do not do the trick for me...I can not ask myself after doing something...what if, or what would or might be... There are some things I can do with those regrets where the people who I did or said something to are still alive (I can make a list like Earl onthe TV show), of course most of my regrets are with people who are no longer here. DAMN. If you are reading this, don't get to the point where I am now...if you need to tell someone you are sorry for something you did or said then DO IT. If you need to tell them how much you love them knowing you will regret not telling them when they are gone...DO IT. You will just have to take my word for it now. You know that feeling you get in your gut when you see the police lights flashing in the rear view mirror??? Well I get those on a daily basis. Shoulda, Coulda, Woulda don't cut it now, and sure the heck won't cut it later when something happens that you might regret for the rest of your life.

Sunday's Sleep-in

Was nice to sleep in today til 5:00. It has been awhile since I have slept that long. I am so sore today, I guess all the work from kids kamp is catching up to me. I have decided that after I get back from holidays that I am going to go back to church again. I think I will try Rosewood again, and put some effort in of my own, rather than just take. I can't remember the last time I went to church when I was on holidays. I am sure it was around Christmas time 1990 something. I wonder if most people are like me that way. So a quick question before signing off today, what does ministry look like to you or how should it look like in the church as far as pastors and those who attend when it comes to "programs" (I really hate that word). Should we all be involved? Should we all help out? I will get back to this sometime next week. Thanks for coming to my minute church.

Saturday's Sleepy

One more work day this week. I am so looking forward to Sunday and Monday off. It has been a longer than normal week this past week at work, to me a very successful kids kamp at church. Someday I will blog about church ministry as it relates to all areas but not today. Stay tuned, maybe before holidays come up.

Wow, holidays...guess I won't be blogging then. Where ever we are staying I don't think people have computers in their homes. Although there is a library in Morden, so I will have to try there. Hope you can all manage a few days without me boring you to death. Maybe that is what happened to everyone lately. I have bored y'all to tears and you don't come back anymore :) Oh well, maybe I will keep learning something from blogging here. Thought I did, but I think for the first time since 1993 I am wrong. Wow this getting wrong or being wrong it hard to take. Guess that happens as you get older, right Sheryl. :):):) Not sure if you are reading my blog but as you know I love to bug you. If I did not have you to bug who would I bug. Hmmmm food for thought, but I am not hungry enough to search for that answer. besides I don't think I would find one. Have a great weekend all.

Friday's Forum

Sad day at work today....well kinda sad. The new kid...Sara lee is leaving us to head to baking school (just kidding) in Czech Republic in a couple of weeks until the end of April with Athletes in Action. The movie slap shot will never be the same. Good thing she does not read my blog. Seems like just a year ago when we were fare welling the new kid who held the same job as Sara. What was her name again. Oh yeah How could I forget the issues I had with her. I wonder what ever happened to her? Will I miss Sara....meh... :) There goes my new tennis doubles patsy......oops I mean partner. Yes I will miss her. There was never a dull ...hmmm never a dull quiet moment with her around. In some ways I feel like a square peg in a round hole with the people I work with. Those I work with that are reading this might know what I mean. I am probably the person who talks the least... I kinda like it that way...sort of similar to my job...behind the scenes....let the others do the talking...and once in awhile stir the pot when it reaches the right temperature in conversation. Timing is everything. Good thing I don't blog about everything we discuss right co-workers...no one would ever believe me :):):) I guess the temperature of the conversation called for some good old fashioned pot-stirring right there. Have a great day all....TENNIS ANYONE. I could use a new partner.

P.S. So long Sara (Amanda), yeah you will be missed. No really. You brought a lot of positive energy into the church. Keep in touch kid.

Thursday's Tick

More and more lately I have felt like such a hypocrite in my faith. I say I believe in God, but my actions do not back that up. I think anyone can put up a good front, and people will believe that they are a follower of Christ, I know this, because I live this. I can do and say all the right things in front of others, but to God it don't mean $%#&. He knows every detail about us, and every thought we have. It comes back to the mask. It covers not just the face. When a hockey goalie puts on a mask he wears it so he won't get hurt by a puck shot to the head. In the same way, my mask protects me from a lot of hurt that would come from others if they knew what was behind the mask. I guess we all have something similar to Paul's thorn in the flesh. The difference between the goaltenders mask and mine, is that he can take his off after the game is over. Mine will stay on forever...or until God removes it.

Wednesday's Wants & Wishes

Favorites? We all have them, right? (Check out the new videos this week - One is called New favorite) Favorite kind of chips, or chocolate bar, pie, ice cream, food, fruit, brother, sister, parent?, friend, and the list can go on and on. Do I have favorites. Absolutely. Lays Salt 'n Vinegar chips, Milky Way triple Tornado ice cream, apples, lemon meringue pie. As for fave brothers and sisters...yeah I have had those too...but over time they change...one year it was Paul, then John and then Steve and then John etc....same with the sisters, and nieces and nephews and people who have worked for me. Even parents. Growing up Mom was my favorite, then when I hit about 20 it was Dad. Heck, I even have a favorite son, but I won't choose a favorite daughter. :):):)~ I even have favorite friends...and believe it or not...these change also....one time it was whatshername, then it changed to youknowwho and lately Ican'tbelieveshewasafavorite....bet these are not the names you were expecting to read. Some people say they don't have favorites...now don't get me wrong here...I am not saying they are lying...I am just saying I have favorites...and why am I saying that....because I can. Now I guess I kinda lied...I don't have a favorite everything.....one favorite that will never make my list of favorites is favorite green veggie. That's just wrong. Well it's time to leave for my "favorite" job ;)

Tuesday's Tired

Getting old kinda sucks. Even though in my head there are still lots of things I think I can do, my body talks back to me and says, "oh no, you can't, don't even try and attempt to .....". After I do it anyways, my body says "SEE, I told ya so". I drag my sore body home on a daily basis, where 20 years ago that was not the case. Oh well, it is not really something I can change anyway. Maybe if I were more fit, I would not feel so physically tired, or maybe if I did something else...another kind of job....I am working on it ;);)...kinda....just too tired to do a whole lot of work to change how things are. On the bright side....there is a bright side to getting old...I know you really want to know what it is....the bright side is you are alive. As sore as I may be at times, I would (at this time in my life) rather be alive and physically wiped, than dead.

Monday's Merciful

It is good that God is so patient with me. Time and time I mess up, but time and time and time again He is willing to forgive. His forgiveness to me is a great illustration of how we are to be toward one another. I am not the grudge holder type person. Usually within a few minutes of getting really ticked, I come to my senses, and think it really does not matter what that person said or did that ticked me off. I need to deal with it right then and there or it will eat away at me until I deal with it. God's forgiveness is just so incredible. I don't think I could forgive others without God's help a lot of times. I have noticed small changes in me from even a year ago, that things that people did or said to me I have been able to just brush off, where as before I would gets so ticked at them. Slowly and hopefully surely, this will continue. I am still not where I should be. I still have really bad days, but as far as letting things go, things are alright, hmmm but winter is coming.

Sunday's Stay

I know. I am very late in posting today. Did ya miss me that much? All 2 of you :):):) We were out at a friends cabin for the day and just got home. I enjoy those weekends where you can catch up with friends that you only see a couple of times a year, and the best thing is that even though you only see each other a couple of times a year, you can pick up right where things left off. Too bad we could only spend the day with them.

Saturday's Sweltering

Hot weather is awesome, especially when you have an air conditioner. Yesterday's weather made me think of how I perceived hell as a kid. Hot and no escaping it (we did not have air conditioning in our house growing up). Do I think that now hell is this extremely hot place where people are sent. Hmmm Hmmmm, nope.(maybe I am wrong here, but that's okay, it won't be the first time...come to think of it ...it won't be the last time either). I think that is more a metaphor of what it is like. We will thirst for water which is Christ, but there will be none to be found. No second chance after this life is all over. So how come, I am still not going out there and telling people about Christ (so many family members on both sides that are going to hell, and friends too)? Had this discussion not too long ago....if we, who know Christ, are not telling people about Him, are we in a sense sending them there. I know it is their choice, but if we don't tell them, they don't really have a choice. Do they????

Friday Finally

Winnipeg vacation coming soon. Only three weeks till we start holidays. It will be great to get away for ten days...visiting family at a get together Pig Roast at my brothers place. Will be good to see them. We will get to visit Marlene's side of the family too sometime that week. We hope to golf also in North Dakota for the weekend before heading home. Three weeks away still seems like a long time but the next couple of weeks at work will be fairly busy.

This week at work we got some new hmmm more humane gopher traps, which seem to be working much better than the old style where you catch his leg and club him with a stick. Oh the joys of being the exterminator.

Still eating my apples everyday (2 whole months now). Do I feel better for it? Nah, but I am liking apples more and more, and I still look forward to my oreo fudgeo sandwich in the evenings ;) Not sure though if I have cut down on sweets though.

Thursday's Turn

When we were kids we used to dream about what we would be when we grew up, football player, actor, doctor, lawyer etc. Now that we are no longer kids we still sometimes think about what we want to do when we grow up or maybe at this point (over 40) what do we want to do or where do we want to work, where maybe we won't be as miserable. I have those days myself. More so lately (the last couple of weeks) than in the last 6 months. I am referring to job here, not to spiritual life. A couple of months ago I was wavering on whether to move back to Winnipeg (leaving friends here and starting all over at a new job when I have become, hmmmm, comfortable where I am). I have wavered back to the other side to ..."I am ready to leave." Really does make a difference on the mood a person is in when they make a decision. Don't get me wrong. I am thankful to be working where I am and with the people that are there. I think maybe it is just time for a change. Is God telling me this??? I can't say that for sure, but I am open to what he wants of me. I think I need to know that it is God telling me that it is time to move on and not a mood I am in or the sore back telling me it is time.

Wednesday's Winging-it

Probably the one thing, hmm maybe the only thing I find with any importance these days is relationships I have. Relationships with God, family, friends and even acquaintances. Funny how sometimes when a relationship can sour, how your whole outlook on life can change, and quickly at that. Obviously the closer the relationship the more your outlook on things can change. It seems it does not take much at times for a friendship to go awry, a little argument, a little unforgiveness or sometimes it is just plain old distance that keeps a relationship from how it used to be. Sometimes you just drift apart, things change,I guess. How we handle these situations can either drag us down or force ourselves to pick ourselves up, dust off and move on. Sometimes it is not that easy. Almost like a death, there is a mourning process you go through, until you adjust to it finally saying *&^% it or realizing it did bring some joy and help to my life (when I needed it) so I need to be thankful for that. I have dealt with it both ways....not saying one way is right or wrong, it just really depends on what happened to make the relationship sour. Was it my fault, their fault, ......at that point does it really matter whose fault it was? At least we know that with God when there is a screw up it was me....every time.

Tuesday's Trip

The fruit of the spirit in Galatians 5:22-23 I feel I fail so miserably in more than half of these areas. Joy, peace, patience, goodness, faithfulness and self control are those fruits which have either never grown on my branches or have fallen off along the way and rotted on the ground. Like Casey at the bat, there is no joy in Mikeville (some joy perhaps, but too often life is a bitch). Peace I think comes with joy (I am sure that some will say that if you have one you have all, or like the ten commandments - you break one you break 'em all). Patience is getting much better. I find as I am getting older, a lot of "earthly" things don't matter, unfortunately that often extends to my spiritual thinking of late. Goodness and faithfulness are really not even on my radar right now. I think I could change my name to Judas and have more goodness and faithfulness than I feel I have at this time. Self control - hmmm lets leave that one behind the mask for now. On the bright side (no really there is one). I have been able to identify where I have fallen short as far as areas where I have room for "home improvement". On the downside (I knew there was one of those). If these fruit do not continue to produce on my branches then life as i know it looks pretty damn bleak. I have not given up all hope (trust me, if I had, I sure as heck would not be blogging on spiritual stuff right now). I know that only God can stir within me the change that is needed. God is always stirring things within me, sometimes he needs an even bigger spoon than mine. Maybe a good whack across the head will wake me up someday.

Monday's Money

Have you ever wanted to be rich? Or at least have enough money that you do not have to worry about working again, or worry about money again? Luke 12 - Jesus talks about storing up riches for ourselves here on earth. Jesus does not condemn the possession of money, but he warns us against putting all our faith in it to secure our future. We think it secures our future, and maybe as far as our earthly future, it probably does secure it somewhat. We worry so often about money and the lack of that we fail to trust God. Too often, we worry about what we have and how we can keep it and even get more, that we miss out on the things in this life that we should be concerned about (telling people about Christ, helping the poor etc). A rich Christian ... is that an oxymoron? No, what is important is what we do with what God has given us. I really need to remember that daily, that what is have, God has entrusted me with to use wisely (I believe that goes with not only the gifts I have but also the possessions I have as well).

Sunday's Sanctuary

Happy Canada Day. Must say I am looking forward to the long weekend here, because it will be busy at work for the next two weeks. Over these past couple of months of blogging I have appreciated all the comments that people respond to my blog with. I guess for me it has been sort of like church...getting together with people, just not in the church building. In the last week or so I have had more thoughts about going back to church, (I am sure it must be God's moving, because I would not choose to move that way on my own), so I will let you know. NO Deb, not yet, but thanks for asking ;)
In some ways this has been like a small group study, (even though I don't think I would like to lead a Bible study though) and I get to lead with all the questions I have, but I miss the actual people being right there and talking rather than running back and forth and waiting for responses on the computer. The "live" Bible study cannot be replaced by a computer screen blog. It is like lunch time at work sometimes, when there are 5-6 people there and the discussion gets going. Lunch time Bible study. Works for me.